Wear That Hat!

A number of years ago, I wrote a story/blog about my experience in Chicago with a new hat and a wise security guard. It was a metaphor for being your authentic self and leaning into what makes you unique (with a nod to your heritage).

Sharing an affinity for the "lid" with my great grandfather.

A recent addition to my ever-growing hat collection is a pork pie hat that I purchased at the Ann Arbor Art Fair.

I’m revisiting this topic for two reasons. First of all, I had another “hat encounter” with a complete stranger. My wife and I had just moved to Western Michigan and I was in Lowes placing an order for an upcoming project. I was wearing the aforementioned pork pie gem. At the counter next to me, there was an older Spanish-speaking couple working through a translator for their project. I finished and turned to leave and the husband of the couple gently stopped me. He pointed to my hat and simply said,

“Good.”

He nodded and smiled, I thanked him and we parted ways. He made my day!

That small validation, crossing the boundaries of culture and language, meant a lot in that moment, as I acclimated to my new city and surroundings. It was a reminder to make time for those seemingly insignificant gestures–they may be all that someone needs to boost their morale, add some swagger to their step, or give the confidence and motivation to pay the good vibe forward.

At left: the pork pie hat (and the chicken?...it just is). At right: A couple o' cowpokes

Through a member of my new "tribe" here in Holland, that appreciation and "communing" continues, and I love seeing him wear a hat that didn't quite work out for me but he sports it frequently and with flair. You'll hear more about that amazing guy later, I'm sure.

“Sharing of hats” is becoming something of a ritual between me and my dad. He is in Naples, FL and through our too infrequent Zoom calls, we find ourselves modeling or, dare I say, flaunting our latest finds. I couldn’t wait to show him my pork-pie gem, while he had a new fedora that he was trying out. He sent me a newsboy cap that didn’t work for him. Sometimes he can see my hat rack in the background and has commented on hats he can’t quite see and it turns into show-and-tell if there’s something there he doesn’t recognize. For Christmas one year, I got him a gift card to "Peaky Blinders," an online hat store. We "hat" hard.

It all started when we went on one of our greatest adventures together. We trekked out to Colorado and did the City Slickers thing. You know, herding cattle, walking bowlegged after being on a horse all day, slinging back beers at the saloon…like you do. 

It was an amazing, unique way to spend time together. The hat thing came into play because that was a big part of prepping for the trip. My dad went for the Tommy Lee Jones-Lonesome Dove aesthetic…with appropriate goatee. I countered with a practical, lightweight straw number, ‘cuz I wanted to be authentic and realistic about the temperature and the need to be more streamlined (see right side of the picture above).

Whatever, right?!

Bottom line, it started a “dialect,” a thing that we now share. And I love that we have that. It’s just another affirmation to revel in the small moments and find those opportunities to share pieces of yourself, not just with those you know and are comfortable engaging, but reach beyond that to positively disrupt someone else’s expectations and assumptions about those around them. Lean into being confidently kind and appreciative that someone is making an effort to be their authentic self. Wear that hat, my friend!

And if you find yourself called to express that authentic voice in more public setting and want a little bit of guidance and support, don't hesitate to reach out.